Wednesday, August 17, 2011

Pretty Shallow Roots

In this afternoon's in-box, a little love message from the Democratic Senatorial Campaign Committee:


Dear Moogie,

We’re putting together the official DSCC 2012 Election Poetry Magnet, and it just won't be as good if our grassroots supporters don't help us out.

So that’s why we’re asking you: What words are necessary for you to have the most satisfying poetic experience? What words would you include on our new poetry magnet?

Click here to suggest words we should include, and to order your magnet.

Help design our new fridge poetry magnet.
We’re still fighting the TEA PARTY, so maybe we’d better include it. Then there’s Dennis Rehberg, who suggested that PELL GRANTS are just welfare. Oh, and Jon Bruning in Nebraska compared people needing a helping hand to scavenging RACCOONS. And who could forget the GOP presidential candidates? Michele Bachmann said we'd get rid of unemployment entirely if we'd just dump that pesky MINIMUM WAGE. Rick Perry thinks MEDICARE and SOCIAL SECURITY are unconstitutional. And then there’s Mitt Romney, who famously said CORPORATIONS are PEOPLE. Say what? Those are some BIZARRE ideas.

Get the idea? What words would you include?
Our poetry magnet should include GRASSROOTS, because you’re such an important part of what we do. Thanks for working so hard to elect DEMOCRATS!

Sincerely,

Jason Rosenbaum
Director of Online Communications


They're "fighting" the Tea Party, whose existence they pooh-poohed a little over 2 years ago.  Heh.

I'm such a very important part of what those ever-lovin' liberals do!  I'm such a grasssroots supporter!  They'll be more than happy to accept my word suggestions (and a little donation or two).

I don't think they really want to hear my word suggestions (like Jackasses, Communists, heretics).

You'll notice that there are no children's drawings or family photos displayed on that Democratic refrigerator.  I, myself, think that very void speaks volumes about Democratic family values.  Or, maybe they're just demonstrating solidarity with those less fortunate who have no refrigerator upon which to display one's family or its artwork.

Nah -- they're just stick-up-the-rear-end, boring, vanilla people.

Do you have any suggestions for word recommendations?

8 comments:

  1. "Recession...Depression...Obamageddon...Unemployment...Mortgage collapse...Racism at the Justice Department...Fast and Furious...Obstruction...Aunt Zeituni...Golf Time...Party at the White House...Vacation, vacation, vacation...Debt Crisis...

    Yeah, I can think of a few words that will make for great motivation come election time. Send them along with my compliments.

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  2. This is, like, for real?

    I'm not sure why they are asking for words. They can't actually be listening to them when they spiel the drivel they do.

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  3. woah... don't think they want most people's words... for real?

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  4. For real, PH and Cuz. I get these little gems all the time, but this one was just so very middle school that I had to share it.

    Good suggestions, Murph! Let's remember to remind folks of them about this time next year.

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  5. Nyuk! This is almost like some kind of a spoof e-mail deal...

    Election Poetry Refrigerator Magnet... Nyuk!

    I would put an Arkansas Razorhawg, or an Ole Miss magnet on my refrigerator before I'd display anything from Harry Reid's bunch of vicious retards.

    Refrigerator Magnets. They're desperate. This is good.

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  6. I had to read it a couple of times to be sure it wasn't a spoof, Andy.

    I've probably got a spare Razorback around the house for you when you finally see the light!

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  7. Suggestions? Just three lil words: Four. Less. Years.

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