Saturday, June 16, 2018

A Golf Tale


I'm a little idea-deprived in the blog post department.

Sometimes we just need to default to low-hanging fruit. So in the spirit of Pepper's finally convincing me to watch golf on tv, willingly, I forthwith offer this memorialization of the "Day That Phil Mickelson (probably) Lost It."

This is US Open week -- a big tournament, one of "The Majors," one of the four tournaments in Golf's Grand Slam.  A title coveted by anyone who has ever swung a club.  The only one of the four that Ol' Lefty is missing.

He's not likely to win this year's US Open Trophy after today.

It seems that Phil was feeling a little frustrated during today's round (and some commentators speculate that he committed his violation of the rules to protest the placement of the cups on the greens), so when his bogey putt ran past the cup on the 13th, he chased down the ball and putted it back toward the cup while it was still rolling. 

That is apparently a near-hanging-offense in the PGA.

He was assessed an automatic 2-stroke penalty and wound up with a crushing 10 on the par 4 hole.

He explained that he didn't mean any disrespect by committing the offense; that he simply didn't want the ball to roll off the green leaving him with Lord knows how many extra shots to hole it. Of course he also said, “I’ve had multiple times where I’ve wanted to do that, I just finally did.”

I'm afraid the Rules Committee may have gone in search of a rope.

Oh well, the College World Series kicks off tomorrow and my Omahawgs will be there!  Wooo Pig! Tuck Fexas (as we used to cheer back in the day)!!

Happy Fathers Day Eve!

Friday, June 15, 2018

An Anniversary to Remember



On June 10, 1978, Pepper and I watched as Affirmed won the Triple Crown by edging out Alydar in the Belmont.We were on our 1-day honeymoon at DeGray Lodge in an Arkansas state park on Lake DeGray. We had eaten our Wedding Night dinner at Glynn's Truck Stop in Arkadelphia on our was to the Lodge after our Friday night wedding.  Here we are heading to the Lodge.  Look how young and skinny!


Flash forward 40 years. On June 9, 2018, Pepper and I watched as Justify took the Triple Crown!  It seems that our wedded bliss is good for racehorses.  Pep says we should watch another on our 80th anniversary.

Forty years married.  Dang.  I guess we'll keep one another around.

What a guy!


Tuesday, June 12, 2018

How Refreshing!

I witnessed something delightful today at the Krogerville.

I was in line at a check-out counter behind a young mother who was unloading her basket while her elementary age children were snooping around the candy and gum displays. The daughter, probably 10 or so, wore her down until the mother gave in to her pleas for mints.  "But," the mother insisted, only get a small box, not that big one."  So the little girl bounced over to the next aisle in search of a small box.

"Molly!" the mother called. "There's a small box over here." But the little girl didn't understand what her mother had said.

This is where it gets good.

Instead of yelling "What?!" to her mother, the girl said. "Ma'am?"

The mother repeated, and again the girl replied, "Ma'am?"  She finally understood the third time around and returned to our aisle. I smiled a big ol' smile to myself.

How many children these days do you know who address their parents (and other adults) as Sir and Ma'am? Not too darn many, I'm here to tell you.

After she paid and was heading out I pulled the young mother aside and told her that I just had to compliment her on her daughter's manners, and that witnessing how well-behaved she is simply made my day.

She smiled a big ol' smile, too, thanked me, and said,"It's still going to be a long summer!"

I think I made her day, too.


Monday, June 11, 2018

Charles Krauthammer Faces the End

Last Friday, FOX News released a letter from Charles Krauthammer. I initially hoped that he was announcing his return to the panel on Bret Baier's Special Report.

Mr. Krauthammer never failed to impress me (or amuse me!), but his return is not meant to be. The following is a letter from him to his public, announcing not his return, but his imminent death:

A letter from Charles Krauthammer:
I have been uncharacteristically silent these past ten months. I had thought that silence would soon be coming to an end, but I’m afraid I must tell you now that fate has decided on a different course for me.
In August of last year, I underwent surgery to remove a cancerous tumor in my abdomen. That operation was thought to have been a success, but it caused a cascade of secondary complications – which I have been fighting in hospital ever since. It was a long and hard fight with many setbacks, but I was steadily, if slowly, overcoming each obstacle along the way and gradually making my way back to health.
However, recent tests have revealed that the cancer has returned. There was no sign of it as recently as a month ago, which means it is aggressive and spreading rapidly. My doctors tell me their best estimate is that I have only a few weeks left to live. This is the final verdict. My fight is over.
I wish to thank my doctors and caregivers, whose efforts have been magnificent. My dear friends, who have given me a lifetime of memories and whose support has sustained me through these difficult months. And all of my partners at The Washington Post, Fox News, and Crown Publishing.
Lastly, I thank my colleagues, my readers, and my viewers, who have made my career possible and given consequence to my life’s work. I believe that the pursuit of truth and right ideas through honest debate and rigorous argument is a noble undertaking. I am grateful to have played a small role in the conversations that have helped guide this extraordinary nation’s destiny.
I leave this life with no regrets. It was a wonderful life – full and complete with the great loves and great endeavors that make it worth living. I am sad to leave, but I leave with the knowledge that I lived the life that I intended.

Elegant and graceful to the end.

His was a life well-lived.  He excelled at most everything instead of pouting at the hard hand that life had dealt him.  Godspeed, good sir.  I shall miss you.


Thursday, June 7, 2018

A Little Laundry Levity

Pepper got some new golf shirts recently, so when I started sorting the dirty clothes this morning I had to check the instruction label to see whether they needed to be hung to dry or could be put in the dryer.  Here is the label:



Not as funny as the one that advises to "remove baby before laundering" but clever enough to warrant a giggle, which is always welcome on laundry day.

I wonder why the French instructions didn't include the giggles? Nah -- I don't think I want to go there.

Tuesday, June 5, 2018

The Dilemma of Convenience

My OCD went into hyperdrive today at the grocery.

My Kroger (that I call "Krogerville" because it's so big it should have its own zip code) offers two sizes of shopping carts: the standard big one and a shorter, two-tier, smaller one. I appreciate the smaller ones because I'm too short to unload the larger ones easily. I usually find one in the parking lot and push it inside the store because there are times when all the smaller ones are outside.

It's nice to have the choice, but the choice presents a big problem in the parking lot "Cart Corrals."

Unthinking people often just shove their empty carts into the Corrals, willy-nilly, order and symmetry be damned, with big ones looking all sideways and catty-wampus, or smaller ones shoved haphazardly into larger ones. Or, worse, they just shove the carts in the general direction of the Corrals, not caring whether the carts actually get into the Corrals. And don't get me started on the trash left in the carts!

I'm usually able to ignore all that disorder by just closing my eyes to it and scurrying back to my car.

Today, however, something in my growing-feebler-by-the-day brain snapped, and I found myself straightening not one, but TWO messy Corrals.  I worked up a pretty good sweat, but at least I didn't draw a crowd of puzzled onlookers.

The Corrals looked much more orderly, and my blood pressure quickly dropped back down to its normal as a result.

I may need professional help.

Monday, June 4, 2018

Clever Canine Manipulations


Mysti Girl is so funny, and pretty clever.

Our Doggie Girls like to cuddle with me on the couch during the evening, and it varies who gets the plum seat next to me, usually first-come, first-served. But when the Son's pup, Chelsea Belle, was staying with us during his deployment, she often got the spot closest to me because she is small enough to sit on the footrest of the recliner without collapsing it.


Chelsea is also a titch toy-crazy. She will show you a toy in her mouth while waggling her rear end all over the place for hours. And Mama Mysti took note of that.

Around Christmas, when Mysti wanted to sit next to me but found Chelsea already there, that cagey Mama would go in search of a toy and bring it to me. She would then start playing "tug" with me, putting only her front paws on the couch, and pulling the toy perilously close to Chelsea who, of course, couldn't stand not having the toy all to herself. Then Mysti would yank the toy from me and "toss" it across the room. Chelsea, of course, would spring into action and triumphantly leap down to grab the toy before anybody else could . . . while Mysti hopped up on the couch and helped her whole self to my lap.

This is what Mysti looks like when she's feeling close enough to me:


Yap's almost close enough:

They're both pretty darn close:



Last night, Yappy had claimed my lap and Mysti was nowhere to be seen. Suddenly, I heard toenails clicking across the floor and here came Mama Mysti, trotting into the living room, carrying -- you guessed it -- Yap's favorite toy.  A few minutes later, Mysti was in my lap, and farther down the couch was this:


Oh, that clever Mama.  Sneaky, too.  Heh.