I've Got an Eerie, Creepy Feelin' (with apologies to The Eagles)

What a strange day.

The Chinese stock exchange crashed. There were "computer glitches" that shut down United Airlines, the New York Times, and the NY Stock Exchange!  But, of course, there was nothing suspicious about that; no terrorism or hacking. Just "internal technical issues." Riiiiiight.

Do you think it's a coincidence that the Terminator movie opened just a few days ago?  Could Skynet be cranking up?

Then, shortly after lunch, our landline phone rang and announced that "Pepper" was calling. Caller ID even identified the caller as "Pepper." He's playing golf with friends today so of course I answered it. But was it my Pepper on the other end of the line?  Uh, no. It was the pre-recorded voice of "Rachael, from card services." Spoofing.  What a creepy practice.  Not to mention infuriating.

Agggghhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I think I might need to go out and look for four-leafed clovers and rabbit's feet.  And dig a moat around Moogie's Manor.

Post-election Fatigue

Tuesday was Primary election day in Arkansas. The ads were flying fast and furiously. Some were amusing, some were tacky. But, there were a boatload of them and we got really tired of them.

I mean really tired!

So, in an effort to curb campaign spending, (and in a bigger effort to effect a de facto enactment of term limits) I'm dragging out my old Plan to re-vamp how folks get sent to DC to run (and ruin) our lives:

TUESDAY, DECEMBER 8, 2009

Moogie's Fun and Revolutionary Plan for Public Service Reform in D.C.

In a moment of blinding clarity, I have stumbled upon what could be the salvation of our nation and our Republic.

We have to chunk out our system of federal elections and start over from scratch.

The states may continue to do whatever they please for intra-state elections pursuant to the Tenth Amendment, and that'll get the Feds off their backs for a whole lot of stuff, primarily because the Feds will have been forced to acknowledge and abide by the Tenth Amendment. If folks don't like what policies their state is enacting in connection with a particular issue, like, say, same-sex marriage, then they are free either to try to effect change in their state through legislation or move to another state whose laws more closely reflect their beliefs. Hello, Republic! A confederation of independent states who are free to follow the will of their citizens, not the sometime-well-intentioned-but-often-cuckoo citizens of Soviet Socialist Massachusetts or Pelosi-world.

You may not be aware of the fact that I was -- fairly recently -- a strong opponent of term limits. I believed institutional memory to be a very important component of orderly government -- we shouldn't have to re-invent the wheel time after time after time simply because no one was in Congress or the Governor's mansion who could remember what happened the last time someone came up with the same boneheaded idea, or how badly its implementation failed. Today, I simply don't care. There are too many boneheaded ideas floating around this ol' world to prevent their redundancy, so opposing term limits is no longer on my radar.

The notion of needing to devise some reasonable facsimile of term limits brought me to the election of our Republics' representatives in D.C. -- so, let's just get all Constitutional about it and return to the Founding Fathers' notion of true "public servants" in which people are called to serve their fellow citizens for a brief amount of time, not to make a career of meddling in the lives of every citizen.

We can retain the Constitutional requirements for eligibility to serve (e.g., age, natural-born citizenship, residency) -- they're pretty sensible. But as for the actual "election" -- there will be no further federal elections.

We're going to have a National Public Service Lottery.

Every eligible U.S. voter (eligibility to be determined by each state) will be required to purchase two lottery tickets: one each in the POTUS/VPOTUS Scratch-off in which only two tickets have all the magic numbers (indexed to population or voter registration; details and cost to be worked out later), but the Presidential Powerball Number on one ticket wins the White House and the runner-up moves into One Observatory Circle at the U.S. Naval Observatory as VPOTUS, both for the Constitutional term of four years. No one may win the POTUS/VPOTUS Scratch-off more than two terms in a row.

Additionally, the eligible voters of each state and territory will be required to purchase similar lottery tickets for Senator (lotteries to be staggered to accommodate rotating 6-year terms) and Representative: one winner per slot per state.

Of course, we'd have to do away with the Electoral College and replace it with a Commission of Electoral Inspection to determine the qualifications and eligibility of winners. The Commission could be composed of 3 members (to have a tie-breaker), appointed, one apiece, by the President, The Senate, and the House of Representatives. Vacancies occurring in Congressional office could be filled by vote of the vacant office's State Senate; presidential succession would be in effect until the following lottery.

Would there be a chance for cheating or corruption? Of course. Is there now?!?! (Hello, ACORN.) Would some mind-numbingly unqualified folks win the Public Service Lottery? Um, duh -- but what's the difference between that and the current system?

Could the loss of institutional memory be regretted, especially in the House of Representatives? Most probably. But, tinkering with the details could find a reasonable compromise to extend and rotate terms in the House, so let's not throw this idea out without trying it.

It's fun! It's a revenue generator! It's a regular fruit-basket turnover in D.C.!! It's Moogie's Revolutionary Plan for Public Service Reform in D.C.!

I've given you the bones -- now, hammer out the details.

It could work. And there would be no ads or robocalls! Someone needs to bust out some Petitions.

Score Update: Free-Market Medical Care 1, Single-Payer System 0

Advocates of single-payer healthcare systems like they have in Canada argue that they are the way to go. There is never a problem with shortages of providers or long waits for treatment.

So, how come the loopy Mayor of Toronto, Rob Ford, hopped a plane to Chicago to enter rehab instead of checking into a facility in Canada?

It does give one pause.

1 + 2 = 12

While searching for a specific pic of Elder Daughter to post on Facebook (Today's her birthday -- it's amazing how she continues to age while I have stopped!  Heh.), I ran across this post from 2011:

THURSDAY, OCTOBER 27, 2011

The Pre- Halloween Power of Twelve

Something just occurred to me that adds up to 2012 being a banner year for Moogie's family.  Something big must be coming.

Consider these addresses with connections to us:

#12 Sandstone Court -- where I lived when I met Pep

1912 Arrowhead Drive -- the address of our first house together

2613 Wentwood Valley -- our next house -- 2 + 6 + 1 + 3 = 12

4503 Moogie Lane -- the current site of Moogie's Mansion -- 4 + 5 + 0 + 3 = 12

1912 Landry -- the address of the New Orleans Military and Maritime Academy where Pep is a new member of the Board of Directors.

ADDITION -- Younger daughter pointed out that her wedding date, 06-04-11, also adds up to 12!  Elder daughter's only misses by 1 -- 04-24-10 = 11.  Curiouser and curiouser!

Or, if you take the more "typical" numerology route, 1 + 2 = 3; 3 stands for "fulfillment, social gathering, achievement," so, unless we plan to host a big, successful party to explore the mysteries of the Mayan calendar, I doubt that The Apocalypse will come into play.  I suppose we need  politely to decline any invitation to attend such a party, too, so please don't invite us to one.

Pretty weird, huh?  What do you think?

Ordinarily I wouldn't re-post something like that, but I have thought of some more big Twelves.

The Son was born on 12/2; his first son was born on 2/12.  

When Pepper moved to New Orleans, Younger Daughter and I moved to an apartment down the street until she graduated from high school, then we moved to NOLA full-time.  The address of the apartment was 2221 Wentwood Valley, #12.

Our new palace, Moogie's Manor, bears the address of 14212 Moogie Court.  And, yes, that Twelve did indeed factor into my evaluation that this house was meant for us.  (Along with several more coincidences).

So,there was no Mayan Apocalypse in 2012, but Obama was re-elected.   That's disaster enough.

I wonder where my next Twelve will come from?

Feed the Children?

First authorized in 2010 by President Barack Obama, financed by the U.S. Department of Agriculture, and administered by the Louisiana Department of Education, a new program has been initiated in New Orleans that provides evening meals to local school children from low-income families. The balanced meals are prepared by Second Harvest and served at seven sites, including three after-school programs, in "at risk" areas at a cost of $2.72 per meal.  A recent article in the Times-Picayune describes the program which hopes to serve 1,200 children by the end of the school year.

The article also recounts a few troubling things, some of which concern me a little bit, too.

Don't get me wrong -- I have no problem contributing to the nutrition of children and families in need.  The private sector does a pretty good job of addressing the problem -- Second Harvest is among that number, and we have regularly contributed to help it stay afloat.  We did the same for Potluck while living in Little Rock.  Public schools have done fairly well with breakfast and lunch programs, too, with glaring exceptions such as the recent North Carolina Nazi Food Police, and the ketchup-as-vegetable debacle, among other things. And, I understand and recognize that there is genuine hunger out there, even in these United States.  But . . . .

But.  One of the children featured in the article, 9 year-old Lawrence, is said to have a full belly at 6:00 when his mother picks him up now from his after-school program instead of a growling one.  An active 9 year-old boy could be hungry at 6:00 in the evening?  Well, duh!

Did Lawrence's family not have enough money to buy food and prepare it at home?  The article suggests that the family was perfectly capable of feeding itself:

Sometimes his dad would be cooking a pot of something at home.  If his father was working late at Lowe's, they might grab fast food.

But, now there's no nightly rush to feed Lawrence.  Between 4:30 and 5:30 p.m., he and the 50 other children at the North Rampart Community Center sit down and eat a healthy meal, complete with fresh fruit.

There's no need to tend to one's child's needs.  The government will see to that.  And, the government will determine what, where, and when the children will eat.

And, what about the impact of this program on families?  Even a principal at one of the schools was concerned about detracting from family time around the dinner table engendered by the program.  She abandoned that concern, however, when she realized that few families at her school actually shared evening meals at home together, "recounting overheard conversations between students and parents, debating whether to stop at McDonald's or Burger King on the way home."

What?!? They couldn't sit down together at a fast food joint and have a family meal?  Or take the fast food home and share it along with conversation about their day?  Fast food every day isn't the best way to eat, but it's certainly a way when time is short.

So, it appears that the overarching concern here is not actual, debilitating hunger, or the significance of the nuclear family -- it  appears to be all about what goes into the family's mouth.  And government needs to make that decision.  And the taxpayer needs to foot the bill.

Not only does the government have an aching need to tell us what to eat, this program also models to children that they can rely on the government to tend to their "needs," wherever.  That same concerned principal who was won over to the feeding program noticed that at least one-third of the students take the meals home.  There is speculation that maybe the meal is taken home to eat with the family, or to give to Grandma, or for Dad's lunch at work the next day. 

Huh?!?

The meals are intended for children, to help them be better prepared to learn by not suffering from the effects of poor nutrition.  And those children see those meals going to adults elsewhere?  What does this teach them?  How are they being conditioned to rely on the government as they age?

What does it teach them about following rules?  Or about gaming the system.

Another well-intentioned Progressive plan gone awry.

I'm beyond angry -- I'm afraid. I'm just afraid.

The Pre- Halloween Power of Twelve

Something just occurred to me that adds up to 2012 being a banner year for Moogie's family.  Something big must be coming.

Consider these addresses with connections to us:

#12 Sandstone Court -- where I lived when I met Pep

1912 Arrowhead Drive -- the address of our first house together

2613 Wentwood Valley -- our next house -- 2 + 6 + 1 + 3 = 12

4503 Moogie Lane -- the current site of Moogie's Mansion -- 4 + 5 + 0 + 3 = 12

1912 Landry -- the address of the New Orleans Military and Maritime Academy where Pep is a new member of the Board of Directors.

ADDITION -- Younger daughter pointed out that her wedding date, 06-04-11, also adds up to 12!  Elder daughter's only misses by 1 -- 04-24-10 = 11.  Curiouser and curiouser!

Or, if you take the more "typical" numerology route, 1 + 2 = 3; 3 stands for "fulfillment, social gathering, achievement," so, unless we plan to host a big, successful party to explore the mysteries of the Mayan calendar, I doubt that The Apocalypse will come into play.  I suppose we need  politely to decline any invitation to attend such a party, too, so please don't invite us to one.

Pretty weird, huh?  What do you think?

Memorial Day 2011

This captures it all --

We're the Government and We're Here to Help You

So.  The Young President signed the "Plain Writing Act" last fall, and it will become effective in October.  Apparently, the measure will require federal government entities to use straightforward words when communicating with John Q. Public, and to avoid "pompous gibberish" and jargon, according to the Associated Press.

At first blush, I thought how very refreshing that idea was. 

Then I read the rest of the article.  Check out what the motive behind the Act is:

"It is important to emphasize that agencies should communicate with the public in a way that is clear, simple, meaningful and jargon-free," says Cass Sunstein, a White House information and regulation administrator who gave guidance to federal agencies in April on how to implement the law.


Bad writing by the government, he says, discourages people from applying for benefits they should get, makes federal rules hard to follow and wastes money because of all the time spent fixing mistakes and explaining things to a baffled populace.

But can clarity and good grammar be legislated?

That remains to be seen. The law lacks teeth. You won't be able to sue the government for making your head spin after October. And regulations are exempted.

Good grief.  Discourages people from applying for benefits they should get?!?!  If it would continue to discourage people from applying for benefits, I'd applaud Shakespearean or King James verbiage!! 

And regs are exempted?  That's where most of the boilerplate and convolutions live!

I wonder how one gets a job as "a White House information and regulation administrator who [gives] guidance to federal agencies?"

Oh, yeah.  Now I see.  The administrator is renowned Communist, Cass Sunstein.

We're doomed.

It Could Get Worse

With all the death and destruction and gruesome images we've been exposed to recently, over the next few days let us cling to one fervent hope:

That, during the Obamas' upcoming visit to Brazil, Michelle doesn't opt to go all native on us and trot around in a string bikini!

Stolen Humor. Funny Stolen Humor. For Thursday.

Stolen from One Happy Dog Speaks:

Humor for Wednesday

Posted by: vw bug in Humor

Cletus is passing by Billy Bob’s hay barn one day when, through a gap in the door, he sees Billy Bob doing a slow and sensual striptease in front of an old green John Deere .

Buttocks clenched, he performs a slow pirouette, and gently slides off first the right strap of his overalls, followed by the left.

He then hunches his shoulders forward and in a classic striptease move, lets his overalls fall down to his hips, revealing a torn and frayed plaid shirt .

Then, grabbing both sides of his shirt, he rips it apart to reveal his stained T-shirt underneath. With a final flourish, he tears the T- shirt from his body, and hurls his baseball cap onto a pile of hay.

Having seen enough, Cletus rushes in and says,”What the heck are you doing, Billy Bob?”

“Jeez, Cletus, ya scared the bejeezers out of me,” says an obviously embarrassed Billy Bob.

“But me’n the Ol’ Lady been havin’ trouble lately in the bedroom d’partment, and the therapist suggested I do ‘something sexy to a tractor’.”

[Don't make me come 'splain this to you! ---Read the last line again, slowly--out loud.]