From Today's Inbox -- The Obama Lottery!

I could just swoon!  Looky, looky!  I'm on a first-name basis with FLOTUS, and I could win!

Moogie--

I'm excited for the chance to meet you and whoever you decide to bring to dinner.

I really hope you give this a shot.

Give $3 or whatever you can to be automatically entered for you and a guest to have dinner with Barack and me:

https://donate.barackobama.com/Dinner-With-Us

Hope to see you soon,

Michelle

I'm not liking their relentless fundraising.  Or anyone else's either, for that matter.

With Christmas, together with December birthdays and gatherings, coming up, you'd think the pols would back down and leave us alone for just one month!  (Or maybe two months since the bills for December arrive in January.)  But, noooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  They have to keep on sticking out their money-grubbing hands and grinning with their lying-eyed faces. 

Plus, this ruse doesn't even guarantee the contributor a quid pro quo like August's "Election Poetry Refrigerator Magnet" fundraising scam.  Heh.

With my luck, if I lost my mind and decided to kick in 3 bucks on a lark, I'd probably win.  Then I'd have to hire someone to impersonate Moogie for the gala feast with the Obamas, because I certainly don't think I could eat with them in the same room and keep everything down, and that would be really expensive.  Then I'd have to hire someone else to impersonate Pepper because that vein in his temple would start throbbing if he found himself even in the same building as the First Family, and that would be even more expensive!  So, I think I'd better decline this invitation to invest in the Obama Lottery.

I have no doubt that I'll be hearing from them again very soon, however, with another opportunity to part with some of my dollars.  They can't seem to lose my email address!

Do You Suppose They Were Preoccupied?

Weren't the Occupy dudes supposed to have some big, hands-across-America-ish, nationwide demonstrations today? 

Apparently, the New Orleans chapter either never received, or ignored, the memo.  (Okay, it wasn't a memo, it was an email from MoveOn.org -- yes I'm still undercover!)

I was at City Hall this morning to speak to the Council and Mayor on Military Day about ESGR. City Hall is right across the street from Duncan Plaza where the Occupy folks (and their homeless chums who were run out of Duncan Plaza a few years ago, but seem to have found their way back on the coattails of the Occupy Cognoscenti) have pitched their tents (and the city, being ever-prepared for parades and parties, has set out several PortaPotties).  There were a bunch of extra cops both in the entry area of City Hall and the Council Chamber, as if they expected a bunch of Occupiers to storm the seat of city government. 

When I arrived and saw all the cops I actually grew a little apprehensive about being able to get out and to my car after the session without encountering a mob of foolish, fragrant people -- our session with the Council began at 9:30 and was supposed to last until about 11:30; the Occupy Show of Force was supposed to crank up at 11:00 near a sign erected on the sidewalk across the street.  As I prepared to leave, I could see a sea of television news trucks through the front windows.  Hmmmm, I thought.

Then, I walked outside.  And saw this:

I think the news folk outnumbered the Occupy folk.  Here are the PortaPotties.

This whole Occupy thing is starting to get a little amusing to us irrelevant people who live in flyover country.  You know a thing has jumped the shark when The Daily Show starts gigging it:

The Daily Show with Jon Stewart
Get More: Daily Show Full Episodes,Political Humor & Satire Blog,The Daily Show on Facebook

But, I think my very favorite jab at the Occupants so far is this:

Go ahead, Occupunks, make his day.

Pretty Shallow Roots

In this afternoon's in-box, a little love message from the Democratic Senatorial Campaign Committee:

Dear Moogie,

We’re putting together the official DSCC 2012 Election Poetry Magnet, and it just won't be as good if our grassroots supporters don't help us out.

So that’s why we’re asking you: What words are necessary for you to have the most satisfying poetic experience? What words would you include on our new poetry magnet?

Click here to suggest words we should include, and to order your magnet.

We’re still fighting the TEA PARTY, so maybe we’d better include it. Then there’s Dennis Rehberg, who suggested that PELL GRANTS are just welfare. Oh, and Jon Bruning in Nebraska compared people needing a helping hand to scavenging RACCOONS. And who could forget the GOP presidential candidates? Michele Bachmann said we'd get rid of unemployment entirely if we'd just dump that pesky MINIMUM WAGE. Rick Perry thinks MEDICARE and SOCIAL SECURITY are unconstitutional. And then there’s Mitt Romney, who famously said CORPORATIONS are PEOPLE. Say what? Those are some BIZARRE ideas.

Get the idea? What words would you include?
Our poetry magnet should include GRASSROOTS, because you’re such an important part of what we do. Thanks for working so hard to elect DEMOCRATS!

Sincerely,

Jason Rosenbaum
Director of Online Communications

They're "fighting" the Tea Party, whose existence they pooh-poohed a little over 2 years ago.  Heh.

I'm such a very important part of what those ever-lovin' liberals do!  I'm such a grasssroots supporter!  They'll be more than happy to accept my word suggestions (and a little donation or two).

I don't think they really want to hear my word suggestions (like Jackasses, Communists, heretics).

You'll notice that there are no children's drawings or family photos displayed on that Democratic refrigerator.  I, myself, think that very void speaks volumes about Democratic family values.  Or, maybe they're just demonstrating solidarity with those less fortunate who have no refrigerator upon which to display one's family or its artwork.

Nah -- they're just stick-up-the-rear-end, boring, vanilla people.

Do you have any suggestions for word recommendations?

Campaign Season 2012

In yesterday's inbox:

Tomorrow, Saturday, June 18th, is this campaign's first national day of action.


Thousands of volunteers have already signed up in New Orleans and beyond to register voters and collect "I'm in" cards from new supporters.


Can you make it? Here are the details:


What: 2012 Day of Action


Where: New Orleans, LA 70115


When: Saturday, June 18th, 11:00 am


You should come out -- it's sure to be a fun and inspiring day:


http://my.barackobama.com/June18

I see two glaring problems with this invitation, and one big positive.

The problems: 

(1) The New Orleans Hornets started using the slogan, "I'm In!" in their huge marketing campaign for the upcoming season well before the Obama re-election machine officially cranked up.  Signs declaring "In-ness" are sported on lawns all across the region, but they're printed on fields of Creole Blue and Gold, not Baracky red, white, and O-blue.  The campaign, therefore, might believe it has broader support in southeast Louisiana than it actually does and might not work as hard down here.  Wait -- maybe that's not a problem after all.



(2) New Orleans is a pretty big place.  It would probably have been better to give volunteers a precise gathering location instead of leaving them to wander aimlessly around Orleans Parish in search of campaign literature and community organizers.  Wait -- maybe that's not a problem either!

The original Positive that I derived from the invitation (before discovering the inadvertent ones)?  The simple fact that I received the email invite means that I haven't yet been outed as a mole, and I'll be able to continue sharing the info I gather about the Administration and Campaign as an undercover operative! 

Emma Peel lives!

Striking resemblance, that.  Heh.