Attention, Tiger, Moogie Has a Plan to Save Your Lunch

I know he's probably very busy with rehab after his surgery, but I believe Tiger Woods is missing a golden opportunity this spring.

He has, over the years, avoided a number of the smaller tournaments on the PGA schedule, for whatever reason. I recall an open letter to Tiger on the editorial page of the Times-Picayune a number of years ago. It was from a self-identified little old lady. In it, she implored Tiger to come to New Orleans and play in the Zurich Classic, (or maybe it was the HP Classic, before Zurich became the named sponsor, but I digress) telling him that seeing him play in person was one of the few things she really wanted to do before she strolled through the Pearly Gates. He hasn't played there yet.

Phil Mickelson hasn't played there often, but in 2006, the year after Katrina, he went to New Orleans with his whole family, did some work on a playground, and made a substantial cash donation to relief efforts. It bought him immeasurable good will in the Crescent City.

Tiger hasn't played the FedEx St. Jude tournament in Memphis either. As a matter of fact, there are a quite a few of them out there where Tiger has never teed off, and that has ticked off quite a number of his fans. Hence and therefor, I offer Moogie's suggestion for the Tiger Woods Tour of 2014:

Yo, Tiger! Take a little trip to all the tournaments scheduled this season while you can't play, and make personal appearances. Sign a few autographs, kiss a few babies. It would do wonders for your reputation, and give a huge boost to the tournaments' coffers and attendance. You could let your girlfriend, Lindsey, tag along; she could sign a few autographs, too.  Let people take pictures with your cute kids. You'd be a huge hit! And, you could keep your name out there in front of the public -- you don't want to fade from memory now after working so hard to get back in golf fans' good graces following your, er, misadventures that landed you in the sex addiction clinic and divorce court.

It's a capital idea! I'd settle for a small percentage of your next purse as compensation. C'mon, Tiger. Wise up!

Civil War Within the First Amendment

I most emphatically do not share the views on race that Clippers' owner, Donald Sterling, expressed in a recorded private conversation. If given the chance to get to know Mr. Sterling personally, I probably wouldn't care much for him and would choose not to associate with him for many reasons. From the revelations of recent events alone, one can discern that he's not just a racist, he's a cheating, bullying, misogynistic racist.

That said, the death sentence and pay-for-your-own-execution imposed upon him today by the NBA disturbs me. I think it has to do with the evolving trend to consider one person's opinion as more important than another's; one person's "feelings" being more worthy of validation than another's. Political Correctness.

The First Amendment to the US Constitution protects the rights of American citizens with respect to: the establishment and free exercise of religion; a free press; the right to assemble peacefully and to associate with whomever they please without interference from government; the right to contact government representatives; and the right to free expression.  (Wikipedia.)

What the NBA did today, essentially, elevated the opinions and feelings of a group of people above Sterling's. Mr. Sterling should be allowed to express his opinions -- especially in private -- no matter how reprehensible they may be. But, here's where it gets a little complicated -- others, who do not share his views, have the right not to associate with him. This includes the NBA.

Perhaps that's how the issue should be framed -- we do not desire to associate and do business with a man who adheres to a doctrine with which we do not concur. If this is what the Commissioner intended to relate in his press conference, it didn't come across that way. Commissioner Silver stated that the League had determined "the hateful feelings are those of Mr. Sterling.The views of Mr. Sterling are deeply disturbing and alarming." Hateful feelings.

Condemning someone's feelings because they differ from yours, and rendering someone else's feelings superior, is just one step ahead of creating a Thought Police Force. Isn't "diversity" one of the goals of modern society? Shouldn't that include diversity of thought?

Maybe I'm making too much of it, but the tone of the whole kerfuffle gives me the creeps. Maybe my Inner Libertarian has surfaced.

By the way, does anyone else find it amusing that Mr. Silver condemned Mr. Sterling? Maybe Mr. Silver is just jealous that he's merely plated and not solid sterling.

Sorry. Someone had to say it.

And, does anyone else wonder where the coverage of John Kerry's gigantic gaffe concerning Israel (also uttered in private) might have gone?

Moogie Dodges a Bullet, or a Mortar Round

The tornado warning sirens went off last night. Pepper, the dogs (after we convinced Mysti to come out from under the desk in Pepper's office), and I went downstairs to our "safe place" where we remained for a good thirty minutes as the sirens went off and back on. And off and back on. And off and back on. We're pretty sure the cell passed overhead nearby, but we were spared any damage -- we didn't even get any hail(to the relief of the newly planted plants!). The lights also stayed on -- just a couple of flickers. We lucked out.

The good people some 20 minutes from here didn't, including some of our long-time friends from the National Guard. This is near where their new house used to stand, next door to their son's home. Their new brick house. Both houses are now little more than piles of rubble.

Thank God they weren't physically injured. Many Guard friends, including us, offered them a place to stay, but they went to their daughter's. That's probably for the best. The death toll has been revised down to 14 from 16 (because two people were counted twice), but the Governor expects that number to increase.

Weather experts are speculating that the tornado will be classified as at least an EF3. Pretty powerful. It's so very hard to see all this devastation -- the poor town of Vilonia was wiped out yesterday after re-building following an EF2 that hit in 2011. The emotional toll is heavy -- even on those of us who were spared. All we can do to help right now is to donate money to relief agencies -- State Troopers and the Guard are keeping non-residents out of the hardest hit areas to prevent looting and other wrongdoing by scammers who invariably show up to capitalize on disaster. Or to gawk. Been there.

To lighten up a bit, this is a picture that Younger Daughter posted on Facebook after the all clear -- it's Grandbaby #5, and it's captioned, "Baby's first tornado. It's an Arkansas thing."

Sometimes we just need to hang onto a sense of humor. And to train our kids about storm preparation -- #5 has his flashlight and some fruit snacks.

Welcome home to Tornado Alley, Moogie and Pepper, after 14 years in Hurricaneville. I don't think I'd like to be our neighbor if given a choice -- we seem to be storm magnets.

Young, Foolish, and Felonious

My goodness. Moogie seems to have been the Negative Nellie the past few posts.

I don't see that changing today.

It's just that there is sooooo much stupidity out there. And so much of the stupid originates in the criminal justice system.

It seems that Arkansas has a relatively new law making it a felony to "exchange sexually explicit material involving anyone under the age of 17" or to distribute, possess or view "matter depicting sexually explicit conduct involving a child." Arkansas Democrat-Gazette.

Now, don't get me wrong -- I don't have a problem with the law, per se. It's a perfectly acceptable function of government to protect children from  those who would exploit them, for whatever reason.  But, when government uses laws like this to punish children, it overreaches that function and sets young people on a dangerous path that can affect them for the rest of their lives.

Yep, the Jacksonville Police busted three young teenagers who had been "sexting" with one another and charged them with felonies. The sexted videos had been messaged to other kids, too. The kids are a 14 year-old boy and two girls, ages 13 and 14. In other words, they are young enough to be daredevils, ignorant of the law, and foolish.

I have a problem with enforcing laws upon a class of people the laws were designed to protect -- in this case, children under 17 years of age. At least the kids were charged in Juvenile Court instead of County Criminal Court. Hopefully the Juvy Judge will find a way to make this felony expungeable so these kids aren't stamped with a Scarlet "Felon" from the get-go and for the rest of their lives. Their reputations are already trashed. Even if the offense was committed by their own doing, they need to be made aware of the ramifications of the transgression without bearing the full clout of a felony.

The Legislature needs to work on this statute a bit -- give it some much-needed tweaking. But, oh nooooooo. They're too busy debating critical matters like the constitutionality of requiring Voter ID and whether we should have more biking paths.

Help!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Moral of the Story: Don't Roast Other People's Weinies

It appears that New Orleans doesn't have an exclusive lock on bizarre crimes.

A former Little Rock Police officer (he was a former officer because he had been fired after multiple suspensions) died early Friday morning in the yard of a blogging hot dog vendor.  For real.

The Democrat-Gazette reported on the crime in Saturday's edition -- the Comments are rather enlightening. Here's the skinny:

It seems that a Mr. Ean Bordeaux, who goes by the nickname "War Chief" of the Creole Houma-Choctaw Nation, makes his living running a hot dog stand in the River Market district. (Side note: His cart sells "Willy Dogs," which is kinda amusing since his assigned spot is on President Clinton Drive. "Slick Willy" -- get it? Heh. I wonder if he did it on purpose.)  Mr. Bordeaux also publishes a blog entitled, "Corruption Sucks," in which he recounts what he perceives as central Arkansas officials' misdeeds. "Syndicated  Social Justice Worldwide." (Caveat: Mr. Bordeaux uses rather -- ummm -- colorful language.)

Some years ago, Mr. Bordeaux witnessed then-Officer Todd Payne brush off a bar fight while on duty in the River Market by refusing to interfere or help the bar's owner. Bordeaux blogged about the event, and other of Payne's misadventures. A lot. He continued to blog about Mr. Payne and his wrongdoings even after Payne was fired by the LRPD in 2010, the most recent post being entered on March 1 of this year.  A scrolling banner proclaims in red, "This page will be updated regularly." He refers to Payne as Joel "Creepy Todd" Payne. Payne apparently was, indeed, rather creepy. Payne apparently also took major offense to Bordeaux's attentions.

In the wee hours of Friday morning, Bordeaux was awakened by his dogs' frantic barking. He checked a security monitor and saw his Willy Dog cart -- his Willy Dog cart that was equipped with a propane tank -- ablaze in the backyard, adjacent to the house where his four children were sleeping. He dashed outdoors, put out the flames with his hands, and called 911.  While awaiting the police, Bordeaux saw a man wearing a hat and mask pouring lighter fluid onto the cart. He chased the man, tackled him, and held him down until police arrived. When unmasked, it turns out that the man was Creepy Todd, a rather portly fellow, and that Creepy Todd was dead. (Facts in addition to those published by the Demo-zette are courtesy of Forbidden Hillcrest, an amusing local blog about "Little Rock crime, history, and weirdness." Also, a trashy blog, Americans Against the Tea Party.)

Mr. Bordeaux was questioned, but has not been charged.

I think this incident qualifies for the "You Can't Make This Stuff Up" file.

Police Beat -- A Dilemma in Mom Jeans (or perhaps something a little more provocative)

Saturday's Democrat-Gazette reported the arrest of the 34 year-old mother of four (ages 8, 9, 13, and 14) on Friday morning. It seems she had sent the 9 year-old from the Motel 6 where they were staying on an errand  to the grocery store, "unsupervised."

The young man was picked up by police as he crossed at a busy intersection about a half-mile from the motel.

The mother was charged with "second-degree endangering the welfare of a minor." She told police that she "didn't realize [she] couldn't send her 9-year-old to Kroger by himself."

Okay. I may sound a little harsh here, but, I didn't realize you couldn't do that either. I know times were different when I was a kid, but we walked all over God's green Earth at that age.  Heck, Pepper was even hunting by himself at that age. With loaded firearms! (Of course, he lived out in the country then, so hunting/discharging a weapon was okay, and he was "supervised" by his trusty beagle.)

How about if you send your kid to the neighborhood pool or playground on foot? Could you wind up in the pokey for that? How about letting him walk to school? Is it the purpose of the trip or the distance from Mom that criminalizes the dispatching of a youngster without supervision? Does it really matter? Should it?

And, yes, I certainly understand that there are bad people out there who would harm a wandering kid. That's why you teach children about stranger-danger and have a "safe word." And one has to wonder why mom-of-the-year chose the 9 year-old rather than the 13 or 14-year-old.  But . . .

I'm really not liking these times in which we are living.

(Of course, the facts that the mother was wanted on outstanding warrants for unpaid fines and contempt, and that she lived in an "interesting" part of North Little Rock in a motel, might have contributed to her arrest, so I'll cut the NLRPD a little slack. Nonetheless, we now have four more kids in "the system," one more single parent behind bars, and a very slippery precedent. It's genuinely complicated.)

I'm shaking my head, both in agreement and WTF.

Happy Easter!

May the blessings and promise of Easter be with us all.

Love, Pepper, Moogie, Mysti, and

Bouie Cottontail.